Money Advice for ADHD Women with Karrie Lemansky
You have been told your whole life to be more consistent, more organized, more disciplined with your money. What if the problem was never your discipline at all?
For so many women, especially those diagnosed with ADHD later in life, the money struggle is not about effort. It is about a quiet erosion of self-trust after years of being told they do everything wrong.
In this episode, we have Karrie Lemansky, founder and Chief Weirdo of Karrie Out Loud, a sustainable business growth strategist for female founders with late-diagnosed ADHD. Karrie built two businesses to six figures, burned them both down, and spent years believing she was simply bad at business, until a diagnosis at 49 reframed everything. She joins us to talk about the Self Trust Gap, the money patterns she sees in ADHD women every day, and why handing things off is not a failure but a form of self-trust.
What is the Self Trust Gap, and how is it different from imposter syndrome? Imposter syndrome says you do not believe you belong. Karrie says most late-diagnosed ADHD women know they belong, they have just stopped trusting their own instincts after years of being told they do things the wrong way. That eroded trust is the gap, and the good news is it is a skill you can rebuild.
How does ADHD actually affect the way women handle money? Through patterns most people never name out loud: hyper-independence, impulse spending, decision paralysis, and income that rises and falls with your energy. Karrie points out that women often judge their money today based on old history that is simply no longer true.
What is the first step to closing the gap? Start almost absurdly small. Karrie calls them micro trust habits, one tiny thing you repeat every day until momentum builds. It is progress, not a 30-day overhaul, that rebuilds trust in yourself.
What money belief should ADHD women throw out? The idea of being paid what you are “worth.” Karrie’s reframe is that your worth is not tied to a dollar, but you absolutely should charge for your expertise and the transformation you deliver.
00:00 Meet Karrie, the Self Trust Whisperer.
06:30 Self Trust Gap vs imposter syndrome.
11:00 ADHD and money, the real relationship.
15:30 Micro trust habits and momentum.
19:00 Why outsourcing is self-trust, not failure.
24:00 The money belief to throw out.
27:00 The Me Before You project.
35:00 What financial freedom means to Karrie.
We would love to hear what you thought of this episode, any questions it sparked, what resonated most, or any topics you would love us to cover next. Click here to send us a message!
Ready to close your own self trust gap and build a business that fits your brain? Join us for the next Money Talks, “ADHD-Friendly Money Systems.” Click here to register for FREE and bring your questions!
Follow & connect with Karrie Lemansky:
- Website
- Podcast: The ADHD Entrepreneur(Her)
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YouTubeAbout the Hosts
Barbara Provost, EdD and Maggie Nielsen, MBA are the co-founders of Purse Strings, a national platform helping women make confident financial decisions by connecting them with vetted financial professionals who truly understand women’s lives and money needs. Purse Strings connects women across the U.S. with vetted financial professionals who specialize in supporting women through divorce, money transitions, and financial independence.
Full Episode Transcript
(This transcript was generated using AI, so please excuse any misspellings or errors)
PS: Karrie Lemansky (MP3)
[00:00:00] I don’t know about your feed, but on my feed, I’ve been seeing a lot more things about women, ADHD, late diagnosis, all those different things. We’re so good at masking it. And it’s being studied more and talked about more, and so they’re finding a lot of these a lot of women having ADHD. And so I know we’ve had a conversation before around ADHD and money with one of our financial professionals, which was really great, and if you haven’t listened, you should go check it out.
But we also find a lot of people with ADHD are business owners because [00:00:30] the cubicle nine-to-five is not the best fit all the time. Which is really awesome to use your ADHD as a superpower. But there’s a lot of things that also get in the way, AKA imposter syndrome, impulse spending, decision paralysis, which can make things challenging.
So I was super excited to have our guest on today, Carrie, as I think diagnosed or not, this relates to a lot of different women out there. I think there are so many different pieces we can pick up and implement [00:01:00] and really focus a little bit more on taking the time for ourselves, even if that’s just two minutes a day dancing to a song, getting ourselves re-regulated and being able to trust in the decisions we have.
Personally, I feel like I have a lot of decision paralysis, analysis paralysis, kind of, you know, “Oh, well, I’ve tried this once before and it didn’t work, so I’m not gonna spend the money and it won’t work again,” you know? It doesn’t have to be like that. And so it, there is really this [00:01:30] building this trust in yourself so you can stay consistent, trust in yourself in that consistency, and really grow your wealth while taking care of yourself.
I feel like I’m Dr. Seuss over here today. So with all that, I am so excited to share this episode. So much great energy. I’m almost exhausted after recording it. So listen in, and as a friendly reminder we are taking audio messages, so you can go to the show notes, check that out, send us your thoughts, send us your input send us what topics you wanna [00:02:00] hear.
I would love to hear from you in that way. And if you feel comfortable and you’re lucky enough, you might be able to get one of those audios featured so we can hear from our community on the podcast. So until next time, be financially fearless.
[00:02:30]
Maggie: Carrie, welcome to Women and Money: The Sh*t We Don’t Talk About. I am excited for this one today. I think this is gonna resonate with so many of the women out there. So before we dive in, can you share a little bit about who you are, what you do, and what led you to [00:03:00] build something specifically for women with ADHD?
Karrie: Well, my name is Karrie Lemansky Straub. I am the chief weirdo of Karrie Out Loud, and my business is people first and mission-based because I feel like there’s a lot of, There’s a lot of sh*t that is put onto female founders or, or women who have ADHD, especially late diagnosed, that we don’t realize runs certain elements in our business.
Karrie: And when I, when I realized what I really wanted was for every ADHD woman [00:03:30] to have whatever success looked like to them, whether it’s that 100K a year business, 50K a year business, 500K a year business, I don’t really care. I just want it to be what they want and to give them that support. So the way I do this is through helping them with self-trust because oftentimes when we are late diagnosed we think we have imposter syndrome, and the whole time it’s this lack of trusting ourselves because we weren’t listening to our own instincts.
Karrie: And everybody around us was [00:04:00] telling “Oh, you’re doing it the wrong way,” or, “It’s, it’s not, that’s not how it is,” or, “That’s not how everybody else does it.” And then you start feeling inept, and you believe everybody, and it becomes a voice in your mind. And even though you know you’re a badass and you know you’re kickass, that little voice sometimes drives some of your life and your business.
Karrie: And so what I help my clients do is well, what I help them, my clients do is get it to shut the frick up like 98% of the time because we are human. But yeah, no, that little voice doesn’t have to live there the [00:04:30] whole time, and I have seen my clients’ lives change, not just their businesses, and that’s the most exciting part.
Karrie: So I just want more of that for people around me and clients to, to know that when they understand that it’s a gap in self-trust and that is something you can rebuild, it’s a skill that you can learn, just like any other skill you’ve had to learn for your business. That’s where your business can really change.
Karrie: And then, of course, business strategy. I have that, like, beautiful mind thing where it’s like I can see all of it in the [00:05:00] air and go, “This is missing, here’s missing, that’s missing,” and then show the client maybe where a little bit of the strategy is. So the mindset part so they feel they can… I do. I do.
Maggie: give it to them?
Karrie: I’m like, “Here you go.” Yes. But the process involves them too, which is the best part. So by the time they get their hands on it, it is that combination of what we created to make sure it worked for their brain and you know, a list. Sometimes they just want a list in order because sometimes our brains have trouble with prioritization.
Karrie: I’m like, “Here’s [00:05:30] what you prioritize, and then here’s the second wave, and then here’s maybe the third wave if you want to.” But it doesn’t have to be so complicated. It gets to be more simplistic when we let it. We have a hard time with that. So those are the things I really support my clients with
Maggie: I love that. And people being, especially women being diagnosed with ADHD, we find that much later in life. I don’t know if part of it, I mean, it’s multifaceted of we’re much better at hiding it when we’re younger. We don’t study women. We have social media bringing this attention to light.
Maggie: We’re able to get [00:06:00] more education on it. So we see a lot more people getting diagnosed later in life, or, you know, whether they feel that diagnosis is essential, realizing that maybe they have some symptoms and we’re gonna be kinder to ourselves because of those things, and diagnosis or not, we can learn how to work with ourselves,
Maggie: right
Maggie: W- is that part of your journey as well? I’m sure as
Karrie: Well, sure,
Maggie: realize maybe
Karrie: because you have this divergent brain and you’re like, I can do this so well. Why, why can’t I just keep doing this?” Or wh- why’d it all [00:06:30] of a sudden change? And you can’t figure it out, ’cause of course we can’t always see from the inside out. So we, we do a lot of self-blaming, a lot of self-judgment, a lot of self-shaming.
Karrie: And so for me, I had a lot of shame in talking about the fact that I had two businesses that both got to six figures, and I burned them down because I was like, “I don’t even know how I’m gonna keep this up. Like, how am I supposed to even grow? Like, how do you even grow this? I can’t barely maintain this now.”
Karrie: And it was two different points in my life that this happened [00:07:00] in, and I’m like, ” Well, I’m just suck at business. I’m not meant to do this.” But what’s hilarious is any desk job I got, I was always laid off because the universe was like, “No, you’re supposed to be doing something else.” But if it hadn’t all gone exactly, exactly the way it went, I wouldn’t have the skill set and the ability to see the things that I can see now to help my clients the way that I do, and to make sure that their business speaks their brain’s [00:07:30] language, not some other language that our brain just does not…
Karrie: Our brain is like, “Does not compute.” So yeah.
Maggie: It’s amazing how at the time it never makes sense, but later in life you look back and you’re like, “Ah, I see why everything went the way it did.” So
Karrie: Yes, and that can be hard at first, especially when you’re first diagnosed. That can be a mind you know what, and then eventually as you get through it… And not every woman has that reaction. Some are like, “Yeah, I knew something was different. Okay, I have a divergent brain. Cool, I’m moving on.” And [00:08:00] others have big huge emotions.
Karrie: So it, it’s just different for each person. But once you get past the part of like my ADHD is my whole personality, you really start figuring out who you are, and that’s another like really fun piece of my own growth is, oh my gosh, like who am I without the outside crap that was put onto me? Is that part of when I’m doing my own voice, or is that part of that collective voice that’s just chirping in my ear that means nothing?
Karrie: [00:08:30] And once I learned to kind of differentiate those, phew, everything changed. My life changed, the way that I do things changed, the way that I run my business changed. But I finally started working exclusively with divergent women who are founders, CEOs, et cetera. when I got my diagnosis, I knew I was going to and it’s just evolved from there.
Karrie: But I’ve been doing this since before everybody was helping with people with ADHD. Like, it’s been a bigger and bigger thing, and I’m so happy because so [00:09:00] many of us need that type of support, and it’s not because there’s something wrong with us, it’s just, again, our brains are wired differently
Maggie: 100%. And so that’s where I wanna dive into more of this. We all have imposter syndrome, but you don’t call it that. You call it the self-trust gap. Can you explain kind of what this difference is, why that distinction matters for women, and how they show up in their business and in their finances?
Karrie: Yes. That is not a problem. So imposter syndrome is I don’t believe I belong here. A majority of the [00:09:30] women that I’ve met who have ADHD, especially late diagnosed, they do not feel that way at all. They are like, “I know I’m a badass. I just, there’s just these things I can’t figure out,” and I’m like, “What is going on?”
Karrie: And then all of a sudden they get language for it, right? And it’s like, oh my gosh, finally. You know that you have the ADHD. know what you’re capable of. But It’s not about that room. It’s about when you make decisions and choices, the self-trust gap itself [00:10:00] is a gap in the trust of yourself because of years, some of us decades, of being told the way we do things is wrong, the way we move through the world is wrong, and by age 12, we get 20,000 more negative messages than our non-divergent counterparts. Now yes, it’s an that’s a lot yeah. Yes, and it’s an anecdotal number, but it’s Dr. William Dodson, he’s been studying AG for 25 years. Even if that’s an anecdotal number, just knowing the [00:10:30] number is higher just because our brains were divergent, and we are sponges until we’re eight, that stuff just soaked up and lives in there.
Karrie: And then if we don’t get diagnosed until later, we have more of that messaging hitting us. And so that’s why I feel like this, because I first saw it in myself. I’m like, “I don’t have imposter syndrome. I know I belong wherever it is that I wanna go.” But like this little voice telling me, ” Well, you can’t do that.”
Karrie: Or you know, and I’m like, “Where is this voice coming from?” And I realized it was self-doubt, [00:11:00] I was doubting what I should have known I could absolutely trust, which was my instinct. So how did that then become a pattern? Well, I started noticing it in every client that hired me.
Karrie: They would say they have imposter syndrome, and every single time, that wasn’t it. They did not trust themselves to be able to carry the next level of their business, whatever that looked like, because they’re still looking at it through a lens of exactly how they’re doing it now. And I’m like, ” No, we remove this, this, this, this, and that.
Karrie: [00:11:30] That’s how you have more room to carry.” And they’re like, “Oh.” You know? You get to that certain point. And then how this comes into finances is oftentimes clients will, who are maybe newer will have trouble investing in themselves. “Well, I’ve made sh*tty decisions before in my investing, in coaching or mentorship.
Karrie: I chose the wrong mentor. They didn’t help me.” Whatever things may have happened to any of us before we understood, gets to be different when you have the right kind of [00:12:00] mentor. And so when I started seeing it wasn’t that, it was self-trust, I started doing these little things because I’m also a life coach, right?
Karrie: So I was like, “Hmm, how can I kinda marry this a little bit without taking away the integrity of actually being a life coach?” And I was like- What if I taught them how to fish instead of cooking for them? ‘Cause at that point, I was still like, cooking for my clients. And I was like, hmm, what if I took the question cause they would be like, “What do you think of this?” Do you think this is good? Like, the questions were [00:12:30] permission and I want approval and I want you to like me and am I somebody you like, to within usually 60 days, them coming to me with a business that fits their brain. They have the foundation under it that they either never built or needed to you know, refine, and then they say, “Here’s my idea, and here’s what I wanna do.
Karrie: What do we think the best way to execute that is?” That’s a whole different person. And that happens, like, I’ve seen it in as little as 30 days, but usually by [00:13:00] 60 it starts rolling. They start shedding things, their business, and then what starts happening is they realize that by shedding they’re gonna make more money.
Karrie: And then they do actually start getting the proof of it, and then saying things like, “I didn’t even know this was possible. I’ve heard people market this, but I didn’t know this was real.” And I’m like, ” Yeah, ’cause some of us talk about it like what it actually takes and how it’s actually very real, but here’s the things we need to do if you are wanting to get more visibility, as opposed to if you wanna go high ticket, as [00:13:30] opposed to if you wanna do…”
Karrie: So I have a lot of experience, and then I’ve been able to take all of this, and the financial piece. I actually have a four-part f- series on my podcast that is about ADHD and finances. Why? there’s like, issues with object permanence, with thinking about times that were in the past but they still feel like now.
Karrie: There’s so many things that can be connected to the financial piece. But for me with business, just understanding that there’s gonna be ebbs and flows, and figuring [00:14:00] out you’re never gonna have the exact formula, but figuring out how to surf. Because they’re gonna come, so are you gonna grab your surfboard or are you gonna bitch about it?
Karrie: like, this is the life we’re choosing, so we can try to plan for it, and I think that was a little bit more into the finances that you were talking about.
Maggie: Yeah, and I do wanna dive like a little bit deeper there ’cause yeah, we have talked before on a podcast about ADHD and money, and they really have this interesting relationship that most people don’t talk about. A lot of impulse [00:14:30] spending, decision paralysis, inconsistent income because of how our energy
Karrie: Yes
Maggie: What are the money patterns that you see most with the women you work with? And like what are some, you know, pieces of advice that you would tell them? Because, I mean, impulse spending, decision paralysis, inconsistent income, those have big effects on your finances. They’re not small things. So it can feel, again, and you have that you know, yelling at yourself for doing these decisions.
Maggie: I mean, it’s this whole cycle. So how do we get some help here?
Karrie: So the money patterns are [00:15:00] oftentimes they will go until their business is almost about to go off the cliff, and they’re like, “I either need to fix it or I’m not gonna do it anymore.” And they bring it to me and it’s usually such small things, but it’s the hyper-independence. So the hyper-independence, the not willing to accept help because at some time in life you’ve had to be hyper-independent or because you’ve been the one who’s always been okay under your masks.
Karrie: Then you are considered like, “Oh, nobody needs to check on you. You got this.” [00:15:30] And that erodes our self-trust. That erodes how we invest because then we come forward and we realize, oh, we’ve been divergent our whole life. This is not something that just develops when you grow up. You know, it’s like, that has to be present in some capacity before the age of 12. That’s part of the testing. And we are judging ourselves now and judging investments now based on history that are no longer facts based on where we are now. Meaning, yes, [00:16:00] I have big impulsive investments. I am much more discerning now about my investments because now I understand how my brain works and how my energy works.
Karrie: My business is also the same. I understand how my brain works and how my energy works, and all of that goes into the money piece because you are gonna work hard. Like, owning a business doesn’t mean you’re not gonna work hard, but you don’t have to work yourself to death and not everything has to be [00:16:30] about finding the perfect way to make money, or it’s finding the things that you truly love to do and knowing how to communicate that to others.
Karrie: And when you treat others well and with kindness, your business will continue to develop over time. And what happens then is you start beginning to rebuild self-trust because more clients hire you, more people see the value in your work, your reputation [00:17:00] starts to grow in a positive way. You start having more retention, you start having more referrals, and you start having more and more and more proof.
Karrie: My number one thing is if you feel like the gap is in your self-trust, is to start with little micro trust habits. So pick one. The most tiny thing. I don’t care if it’s, ” I’m gonna make sure every piece of silverware that’s next to my bed is going into the sink.” I’m making that up. But I’m talking that [00:17:30] microscopic.
Karrie: And if something feels too big, I mean, make it almost dumb, like so easy. And then just repeat doing that for the next week. And then watch what starts happening. Momentum, right?
Maggie: It really is about that momentum because I feel like a lot with those waves of energy that ebb and flow, you know, sometimes you’re waiting on that higher wave to catch you, and sometimes it’s like, well, you’re gonna have to just keep going forward no matter what. And so those little things do add up and help you move [00:18:00] forward ’cause you’re like, “Okay, well at least I can stay consistent in these couple things,” whatever that may be.
Karrie: Or look at it like you’re persistent. Persistence is the thing that keeps us in business is ’cause we’re tenacious and persistent, and a lot of divergent people feel like everything is figureoutable. There are some who do not.
Karrie: They lean on it in a different way, but my perspective is through a strengths-focused lens, but I also know that it comes with a lot of challenges, okay? I’m not putting those down. But what you get more of is [00:18:30] what you look for. Like, we know this in the brain. That’s neuroscience, right?
Karrie: So it’s like it’s the reticular activating system in your brain. So when you look for more, you get more of what you are looking for. If you’re looking for a more positive experience in your business, you’re gonna have more positive experiences in your business. If you start looking for more positive things about you, you’re gonna start finding more positive things about you.
Karrie: Those things grow. Those things help rebuild that self-trust because, for me, I was 49 when I was diagnosed. If I thought that I was gonna be [00:19:00] rebuilding self-trust in a 30 days that’s just a joke. I mean, it’s like, you know, I’m 53. But it also doesn’t mean I am now committed to this life of suffering and healing and always be healing.
Karrie: You don’t have to do that either. It’s understanding how to support those ebbs and flows, have a business that maneuvers with those ebbs and flows in your energy. Like, my business is set up for my energy flow. And I give red carpet [00:19:30] service because I love going deep over wide, but that’s my personal choice in business.
Karrie: So I think part of it is finding those things you wanna really lean into more and finding, like, the tiniest thing. Like, I’m gonna go to the website to even just look at the certification, or I’m just gonna go to this website just to look at the… You know what I mean? Those are the little things that start us moving in those directions that we wanna go, and it has a huge, huge impact on [00:20:00] us, and it can be that way.
Karrie: And when you start proving to yourself that you’re more financially able to work with money, or you bring somebody in who helps you, maybe a bookkeeper, so that you have that feeling of, “Oh, I am handling it,” even though I’m not personally handling it ’cause you’re not here on Earth to handle every fricking thing.
Karrie: You don’t have to. That’s why there are so many service providers. Give yourself that break. I’m telling you, sometimes you take one or two tiny things off and you’re like, ” Why didn’t I do this sooner?” Like, this freed [00:20:30] up hours of my brain space. So I would say those are the things that I’d want people to for sure keep in mind is rebuilding that self-trust one tiny thing at a time, one day at a time.
Maggie: And I love how you, again, highlighted about how pawning things off to others is still taking care of it, you know? I mean, there is nothing like, I just had another podcast with about bookkeeping or taxes. We are pawning those off. We are not spending the time, the energy, anything there. Finding those paperwork for them is hard enough, you know?
Maggie: [00:21:00] And so that is what they’re gonna do. Same with cleaning the house. I could sit there all day and just then dread about, “Oh my God, I haven’t cleaned it. Why haven’t I cleaned it?” We’re just hiring someone, calling it, calling it a day, goodbye.
Karrie: Yep, exactly.
Maggie: You know, and that’s fine. It’s still getting taken care of. We’re still sanitary.
Maggie: Like,
Karrie: And
Maggie: still spinning around.
Karrie: well, and remember, as a society, we haven’t always been the way we are now. We’re a communal people. So we’re living these lives where we think we have to do everything alone, and we think we have to navigate our [00:21:30] businesses alone, and we have to navigate the sh*t we don’t say alone. A- and the truth is that when we have the right people around us in our life, in our business, that does make a massive difference, and we don’t have to be so hard on ourselves about hiring certain things out because we can, and we work our butts off to get here.
Karrie: there’s nothing wrong with wanting those things for the sake of f*cking [00:22:00] wanting them. I don’t care who you are, where you are in your business. If those are the things, if a laundry service is on your fricking dream board, great. I, like, like, make it those things because those are the real things that do change our lives as divergent women, right?
Maggie: Also, some of those things are so much cheaper than we
Karrie: Yes. Oh
Karrie: my
Maggie: so much time and you’re like, “Wait, my laundry’s $20 a
Karrie: Yeah.
Karrie: You’re like, And I’ve been what?” Right, but how… But, but
Maggie: I should’ve done that six months ago. I [00:22:30] bought new underwear instead of doing laundry.
Maggie: Like
Karrie: how many of us haven’t done that? How many of us haven’t bought a new outfit ’cause we just don’t wanna do the laundry? Like, w- we’ve all done it, or most of us, us have done it. But what’s funny is that we do think we’re just supposed to be every single thing to our business, and what I say is, do you think Pink runs every part of her business and answers her emails, or Oprah, or anybody the woman who started Spanx, Sara?
Karrie: [00:23:00] Like, y- no. They all started as one person, but they did not get where they are alone. So I, you know, stop believing you have to do this alone and invest in yourself, but do have discernment because now you do. It’s okay to not do something impulsively. And for me, when I’m in a conversation with an, potential client and they’re really excited about it, I’m excited too, but I also don’t want them buying disregulated.
Karrie: So I [00:23:30] wanna make sure that they’re buying from a grounded place. So that’s one of the things that I just put in naturally on my side to make sure that they don’t jump into that experience. Some of them are just like, “No, I’ve known I wanted to work with you for…” And, and we’d been talking. That’s different.
Karrie: But I mean, if just somebody just random coming in there, there’ll be a little bit more going on there. You get to rebuild the self-trust, and when you do, you really can start taking your business to different places that you didn’t think were possible for you personally
Maggie: [00:24:00] So I feel like we did touch on this a little bit, but like for women who are listening who’ve been told their whole life, you know, they need to be more consistent, more organized with their money, like what would you say to them?
Karrie: I would say do those people pay your bills? No. And do those people run your checkbook? No. But educate yourself. If there’s something you do not know about money, there is so much free sh*t in this world. Information is now free. The nuance is why we talk to our people, the nuance is why we hire, [00:24:30] the nuance is why we do this, but you can find information out there that will help you at least start to find something where your brain goes, “Ooh,” you know, where your brain clicks.
Karrie: Or even just sucking it up and hiring that person to help with the finances and being like, “Why didn’t I do this sooner?” Like we were talking about. So yeah, no, it’s just stop trying to be so hyper independent and allow people to help you and to [00:25:00] receive, because we with ADHD have very difficult time receiving.
Karrie: But when you have the right person working with you, whoo, thing- sh*t changes. That’s, that’s for sure, and your finances are something that you can learn how to grow and manage as you are growing and managing, if that’s property, if that’s investments. There’s always ways to educate yourself about that, and great people around that you can find who can help you with those things.
Karrie: So never be afraid to ask, even if you think it’s a stupid question. [00:25:30] Everybody started as a beginner. Ask it anyway.
Maggie: Yeah. Ask it, and if you didn’t understand the answer,
Maggie: Ask
Maggie: it again.
Maggie: Explain it, explain it in a different way, please.
Karrie: yes,
Maggie: Do you find there’s, like, a consistent money belief that ADHD women need to just, like, completely throw out? Something you hear just all the time where you’re like, “Please, we’re done here.”
Karrie: The thing about getting paid for, paid m- what I’m worth, I don’t like that phrase at all because nobody is worth a dollar. Nobody’s worth m- money. [00:26:00] Like, who we are is not tied to a denomination. But please do charge for your expertise. That is a different way to look at it, and if your expertise…
Karrie: Like, I did math one time that was, like, gross math. It made me wanna throw up. I was like, “Okay, over the lifetime of my client, she had a 66% increase in revenue. If she doesn’t do anything else and just had this monthly 66% increase over five years, how much extra would that make her?” And I did the math. And then I figured out how much I [00:26:30] charged her, and I was like, “Ooh.
Karrie: Yeah, no.” So look at the transformation your clients have, look at the years of experience you have, and make sure it makes sense that this transformation i- is something that they want, it’s something you’ve seen over and over and over again, and stop pretending you can’t do it. You can talk about it. You can do it.
Karrie: Let people know, because that will grow your business or get you referrals. And all of these things are so key to [00:27:00] growing your business long-term, which is what most of us want
Maggie: I mean, for you it’s not like, “Oh, I sat with them for an hour, so I’m gonna charge them for an hour.” It’s like, “I had an hour, but I have 50 years of experience. I have all this education. I’ve built two other businesses. I’ve had all these caller calls.” You know, it’s not
Karrie: You are
Karrie: nailing to the wall. You… Exactly. That’s why the people, they talk about exchanging time for money. Like, I don’t exchange time for money, but I do exchange a transformation for other- for energy. It’s like it’s energy back and forth, right? Money is the [00:27:30] energy that is coming to me for the things that I’m gonna give you that are gonna take your energy and fricking amplify it and evolve it, and people are gonna be like, “Who’s that chick?”
Karrie: ‘Cause I’ve seen it happen with clients of mine. I know that that is something that happens. So it excites me because I’ve had to have all of my own experiences and get my diagnosis and go through all of that to get here. But you can do and have whatever you need to support [00:28:00] yourself and have no shame or judgment around that, even if you would be shamed or judged by people who’ve been in your life, because they don’t pay your bills, and you can always get educated.
Karrie: So to answer, to bring it all back around to answer your question, don’t listen to people whose lives you don’t want to be like and don’t don’t forget you can always educate yourself on anything. That’s how you got here.
Maggie: It’s all good stuff. And so I was creeping on your Instagram and you’re doing a Me [00:28:30] Before You project, which I wanted to talk about on here because as women, we put everybody and their brother before ourselves. And so of course, we’re always talking about it’s like the airplane, put on your oxygen mask before anybody else’s.
Maggie: So tell us a little about this Me Before You project that you’re
Karrie: Yes. Okay, so it started off, I was counting down to something I was going to, to a retreat I’m going on. Because my spouse just finished chemo. He’s been cured from cancer. That was a [00:29:00] lot of … Yeah, we were just so thrilled. We just found out recently. And so I’m going through all of this trauma, and I’m realizing, like, I am frozen.
Karrie: Something’s wrong. Like, something is not right here. Well, it turns out, like, I’ve had trauma throughout my life. I didn’t realize that that’s what it was, and this was kind of like the final straw. And it wasn’t his fault, it wasn’t the cancer. It was like the next episode is what made that happen.
Karrie: [00:29:30] So I started it because I needed to do one thing for me, and I’m like, ” I am no longer picking up my phone to answer anything to do with clients before 10:00 AM. I’m no longer picking up my phone before 9:00 to do anything to do with work, and I’m doing this Me Before You project,” which is what it turned into.
Karrie: It wasn’t what it started as. It started as me start, trying to figure out how to regulate my nervous system better, because I also know how well that would affect, you know, my business, [00:30:00] especially after everything I’ve gone through. then I just kept recording it, and then it kept evolving, and then I realized what I was doing was putting myself before everyone else.
Karrie: Even if it’s for two minutes in your car in the garage, like, I literally don’t care. Because we start our day like, “Oh, I’m gonna do a morning routine,” and we think we need this big old thing. And what it is, is, no, you need something for your nervous system first thing during the day, and that’s what the Me Before Project is really about.
Karrie: It’s I’m doing [00:30:30] things to keep my nervous system calm before I ever talk to a client or a friend.
Maggie: So what are some of those things? I know some of them are like holding off on the phone, which I should probably do. I check my email while laying in bed. Not a great habit, I’ll admit to it. But what are some, like, other kind of low-hanging, two-minute, five-minute things that these, you know, our listeners can start implementing?
Karrie: Yes. Turn
Maggie: all at once, but just a
Karrie: Yeah, turn off your phone news, anything [00:31:00] with the news. Turn off notifications of news. Read your news once a week or so from the sources instead of assaulting yourself with it all the time, because that’s very traumatic for a lot of us. We don’t wanna not be informed, but we also don’t wanna be beating ourselves over the head with that.
Karrie: I started somatic movement, so I will either dance or literally shake, like shake it off. You can use either shake it off, you can use Florence and the Machine Shake It Off, or you can use Taylor [00:31:30] Swift, but literally shaking my body. I started doing yoga, which is hilarious because I’ve always been like a CrossFitter or a like I taught indoor cycling.
Karrie: I’m like hardcore, and my body’s like, “We want gentle.” So I’m doing rowing, little yoga things. But what I did was one thing to start me moving again, to get me out of that frozen mode that I was just in because of what we had gone through. And it kind of grew into going from 10 minutes [00:32:00] of movement, intentional movement.
Karrie: That was my starting point. I didn’t quantify it. I didn’t judge myself if it was just I parked farther away. I didn’t care. All I knew was, it was those 10 minutes. But definitely shaking. Shaking your body is a really good one because we just kind of walk through our day and things are happening to us, and we don’t just kinda shake it off.
Karrie: That can help. Touch some grass, that helps. I mean, I know these things all sound cheesy, but I’m telling you, if you actually take them [00:32:30] seriously when it comes to like your nervous system and you find those couple of things, even if it’s a few minutes, that setup in the morning helps you have such a different day.
Karrie: And I’m on day like 56 or 57, and I can already tell the things that have changed, and I just know. I wanna do it for a year, so that was what I decided. So I’m excited to see what happens once I, once I
Karrie: get to the end of that year. And hopefully some people will start doing it too. Like it’s not an offer or anything, it’s just [00:33:00] do something for your nervous system as an ADHD person before you try to help anybody else.
Maggie: And it’s, it’s crazy how some of these simple, easy things you might hear all the time make such a difference. I mean, I’ve started in the mornings to go to, like, 10 to 15-minute walk.
Maggie: The sunlight, the fresh air, I was like, I could pay people $300 for a new medicine, therapy, all these things. Just a quick walk outside, it’s amazing what will happen.
Maggie: These free resources of Mother
Maggie: Nature,
Karrie: Well, and sleep
Karrie: hygiene. Sleep hygiene was the other one. I [00:33:30] wanted to monitor my stress and my sleep, like to really look at it. And when I really looked at it, I thought, “Oh, yeah, I’m sleeping great.” Wrong answer. I was sleeping maybe three to five hours a night, and I was like, “Oh, why do I wake up tired? I don’t understand.” And now I understand. So now I know what I need for my sleep. I’m not waking up tired anymore. And for our brains, when we’re already… Look, we have Ferrari brain with bicycle brake pads. Like, everything’s going fast in there. That’s, one of my favorite doctors says that. And we [00:34:00] need to make sure that we have a moment where we can just pause and be present, because we’re gonna be thinking behind us and forward all day long.
Karrie: So just taking whatever that minute is, whether you have kids, I don’t care, you can find it if you want to find it. I would do that. Start small
Maggie: Ferrari speed with bike brake pads. That, I love that. That’s amazing. That’s, yeah.
Karrie: Yeah.
Karrie: One of my, the guy who wrote Driven to Distraction and ADHD [00:34:30] 2.0, so doctor he’s the one who’s coined that. He’s been helping people with ADHD for, like, 45 years, and I love that phrase because it is. It, we feel like we have this race car that we can’t slow down. But there are things we can do to, like, have these pause moments because we need them.
Karrie: We need them. Even if we’re fast speakers or fast movers, we still need that, and we don’t realize it until, like, what happened to me. I just hit this wall, and I’m like, “Something isn’t right. [00:35:00] Like, something’s not right here.” And I turned internally instead of trying to logic my way. I went into my body, and I was like, “Oh, look at that.
Karrie: I trusted myself enough to, to do this. Look at that.” So it’s just more self-trust
Maggie: This has been such a fun conversation, just learning so much and just some different aspects and just to reframe so many things. Is there anything we didn’t touch on that you want to make sure is kind of shared with the community today?
Karrie: I would say to do your best to let go [00:35:30] of judgment and shame around money or things you weren’t able to do when maybe you were younger, you didn’t have as much understanding, you didn’t know you were divergent. Give yourself some slack and some- a little bit of extra kindness because we didn’t know what we didn’t know.
Karrie: Our families didn’t know what they didn’t know. But we have that knowledge now, so we can either look at it in a way that’s not positive, or we can take it and [00:36:00] run because we have incredible brains and we can do incredible things. So don’t forget that part
Maggie: I love it. Nice little motivational speech. So, before we log off, there is a question we like to ask all of our guests. So after being, you know, owning many businesses, finding out your diagnosis, coaching so many women, what does financial freedom look like to you?
Karrie: to all of my bills are paid and there is overflow. I’m able to do some of the things or hobbies that I love. I’m [00:36:30] able to spend time with the people I love, and I am a music aholic, a music junkie, so we go to concerts all the time.
Karrie: So those are the things that, feel like freedom to me. And so as long as I am able to do those things, and I, you know, I like some bougie things too. I, I, you know, I’ve, I always have, but most of it I’ve, I’ve bought for myself or, you know, VIP tickets, those kind of things. That’s really why I [00:37:00] do it for the financial part.
Karrie: That’s what the financial freedom piece is, knowing that I don’t have to worry about somebody else’s schedule necessarily, and to have the freedom to go see any artist I love anywhere in the world if I want to, and that’s freedom to me.
Maggie: Thank you so much, Karrie, for coming on and sharing your expertise. This has been so fun. Of course, we’ll have all your info in the show notes so people can reach out, work with you, follow you on your Instagram journey of Me Before You. And until next time, be financially [00:37:30] fearless.
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